wasted day

Im having tuna fish and ritz crackers for Thanksgiving dinner and the world hasnt ended yet. I sat down with my immediate family and ate a frozen pizza in harmony this morning. I sat down with my mom and mother in law Sunday and had dinner in harmony with them. Last time I ate with my sister in law's family it was back last year at Halloween and we were in harmony. Last time I saw my sister it was in harmony. Last time I talked to my brother it wasnt pleasent but it eneded with harmony.

If all of us were instantly transported to Africa would there still be so much emotional stress because it wouldnt be Thanksging it would just be Thursday.

Why is it we entangle ourselves in  so many bullshit emotional ties that contuine to strangle us? Im a good son in law for the efforts I did Monday why am I a ass on Thursday for not cooking another meal for her? I did my part trying to make invited but she had other plans that never included us until she needed a back up plan.Why am I still surprised at this old behavior.

My actions I have to apologize for. My anger voiced for being falsley accused of made up things. I feel to much. But feelings arent real and Ihave no control over them. Im a prisoner to alien fleash that the Enemy has control over. My thought arent always my own. Voices whisper to me all the time. My body craves touch from other people  but I dont give in just because I want to. I have a choice in it. Even if shes throwing her venom full force I have a choice to take it or not. Ghandi said "No one can hurt me without my permission". I give it out way to often .

Mother Theresa said
    People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered.  Forgive them anyway.

            If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives.  Be kind anyway.

            If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies.  Succeed anyway.

           If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you.  Be honest and sincere anyway.

            What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight.  Create anyway.

            If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous.  Be happy anyway.

            The good you do today, will often be forgotten.  Do good anyway.

         Give the best you have, and it will never be enough.  Give your best anyway.

         In the final analysis, it is between you and God.  It was never between you and them anyway.

 Man how I need that tatooed on my forhead everyday! You cant talk to crazy people like they are normal is what Billy always said. I wasted away today consumed with rage about how someone whom I never see and has no real clue thinks about me. I never made plans to have a turkey or ham today so my tuna taste awesome.